Not Who I Created You To Be

I was a meth addict for over 17 years. I was heavily involved in distribution which led to 5 trips to prison. I have been out of prison for over 9 years. Been clean over 12. Yes I count my last prison trip as clean time. Because we know it's easier to get high in there than out here.

When I was waiting to go to prison in 2013 for the last time I remember telling God this all I am and all I ever will be. He said no son, this is who you choose to be. Not who I created you to be. I told Him well i had said a prayer when I was a kid asking You into my heart. He said show me that verse. I said well I believe in you. He said by that definition the devil would be a Christian. He said I have to follow Him. Let me back up.

When Mom passed in 2008 I got angry with God. After surviving 2 open heart surgeries and 3 strokes I hated Him for letting me live and her dying. But to 2013 I decided to follow Jesus. I got to prison entered a faith based program in there and man my life has changed.

Since my release in 2016 I have been involved in recovery ministry. I am now our outreach pastor at my church the chaplain at our recovery center. On the board of brother keepers ministry. One of the chaplains at our county jail. I strive every day to be the man God created me to be. To love those who feel unlovable and give hope to the hopeless!!! I want my past to have a purpose! Is ministry easy? Well of course not. But I have a purpose and peace that passes all understanding.